The first thought I had after I learned I was pregnant last week was: "christ, do we have a deathwish for constant chaos in our lives, or what?"
But the very second was: "hmmmm, could pregnancy possibly be considered a pre-existing condition when applying for health insurance? NO, it's not like cancer or something! I mean sure, it means a definite payout in 9 months, but I'm sure they make some allowance for pregnant mothers. I may have to be a member for a few years, but they wouldn't force pregnant women give birth in their bathtubs. I mean, that would be particularly cruel! Even for insurance companies. I'm sure it will be fine."
Well, it really, definitely, so very isn't fine. If you get pregnant without health insurance, you're screwed and no one cares. I even went so far as to call up an insurance company anonymously and ask them at what point they would determine pregnancy: from the date of diagnosis or would they be getting all crafty and calculating the date of conception from the date of delivery? Because if I were an insurance company trying to get out of paying for something, I hate to say I'd do the latter. They wouldn't even give me an answer. I would have to become a member, make the claim and cross my fingers. Bastards. I mean, if you're going to destroy the happiness and sense of wellbeing of my pregnancy, don't be fucking coy about it. Just tell me that I'm screwed and then we can all move on.
My only defense is that I thought I could get on Poopies' state-offered plan because there is a "Pregnant?" box next to where I put my name on the application. Don't ask me why I thought this was proof positive that they would cover me, but apparently it was enough to make me relax and enjoy myself.
Finally, I got the brilliant idea of calling a midwife's office and ask what the hell they do when this happens, because I couldn't possibly be the only one to have found herself in this unhappy position, unless other women are from a far heartier stock than I, and don't mind going through their pregnancies with nary a test and just a good squat in a field when the time comes.
The midwife was clueless about the insurance question, but simply asked "Why don't you just get on Medicaid?" Because Medicaid is for the homeless and elderly, I thought. Well, actually, the homeless, elderly and the uninsured pregnant, because that's the single option I have, and I'm happy to have it. I'm just amazed that someone in the state government cleared their heads of the red tape long enough to realize that pregnant women were being left out in the fields and made an allowance. In fact, if you're proven to be pregnant, there's not much you can do to not get accepted into Medicaid in New York State. And it's free! And it will cover me for two months after too!
This was the first time in my life that I found myself without, and yet very much needing, healthcare. And I didn't like the idea that I wanted what I couldn't have, even though I'd had it before and I knew I damed well deserved to have it again. No one should be denied healthcare. Ever. It's one of those essential human rights, it seems. To try to stay as well as possible, and to get help if you need it.
Anyway, I'm covered, for now. And that's enough. For now.
Up next: As the family grows, so must the house, and the Cap'n's imagination.